Jodders. Ride a horse - Bond with your horse and gain confidence

Being good with horses is always linked with the bond you have developed over time with your horse. This in turn gives you confidence. It's not just a matter of learning how to push, pull and kick.

Horse riding can be a nightmare or a joy because it depends so much on the bond between horse and rider.

So just how do you make this bond?

Well, it won't necessarily happen over night - it takes time. Just as a good partnership or marriage has to be worked on and cherished, especially if it's new, so does time spent with your horse. Yes, you are probably short of time. You might get in after work and get down the yard sometimes when it's cold and dark, and you just want to get the chores done quickly and get back into the warm. Well, these times when you're there are important for your horse, even if it's only a short while. This is the time when they get some attention and care. However much you might just want to muck out quickly, throw the food in and go - don't! Stop and talk, groom - then groom some more. Grooming is the way to really get to know a horse, and show them that you want to be there

It's the same when you get down to the yard to ride. Don't just throw on a saddle and hit the tracks. Have a talk, groom, then groom some more. Find out what sort of mood she's in. Take it slow.

When riding is new to you, taking your time is important. Sometimes it feels as if everyone in the yard is an expert except you, and they're all keeping an eye on you. This makes you nervous. And when you become nervous, everything becomes much harder. Your fingers fumble, the rug won't fit, and your horse starts to play around and not listen to what you are saying or want her to do. You get annoyed with her, and it all becomes a bit fraught, and suddenly you're not enjoying it. The next day, it happens all over again, until every time you go to do something with your horse, it has become a big battle. Grooming is a chore, putting on the saddle a nightmare, and riding - almost a major trauma. So when it all gets a bit fraught, just slow down. Don't let your expectations get ahead of you. To begin with, just do a bit of grooming, and leave it at that. Then when this becomes calm, put the saddle on. Just put it on. Then take it off again. Do this until you can do it without thinking about it. Do it until it's not a major event and you can do it without getting in a dither. Do it until you can do it and still feel calm. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks. Now you're ready to get on and ride.

Show that you're not just there for you and for riding, you're there because you want to be with your horse. And hopefully she'll want to be with you!